"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
