Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
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