You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize