Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
you inspire me to be a worse person
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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