So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize
