Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
