you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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