make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
