Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
