I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
