you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I have post one night stand depression
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
