I cockslap morals
I think my vagina is haunted
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize