so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
