did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just invented taco cereal.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
