i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize