You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
