It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
