yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
She bit a glass in half.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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