i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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