she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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