you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I'm always down for nudity.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
