I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize