You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
