I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
