Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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