meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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