there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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