Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
