No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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