I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
