So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
