my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I know her cup size but not her name....
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