it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
