went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Walk of Shame today included voting.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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