Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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