Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
