I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
