shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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