it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize