She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize