Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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