he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I can't trust your balls anymore.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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