He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
