If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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