I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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