she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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