Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Did I show you my penis last night?
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
