You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize