i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I deserve to be covered in dicks
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize