$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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