I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
