i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
